Thursday, 4 October 2007

Thursday Thirteen - Singles Ad

I'm sure everyone's seen a certain 'Companion Wanted' ad floating around the cyber world. Here's an ideal ad I'd like to see in the local paper. Of course, you know where this is going so there's no point in being coy:

1. I have thick platinum blond hair with no sign of oncoming baldness

2. I'm single, never married

3. I'll listen when you talk to me

4. I take instructions without arguing

5. I enjoy a nice stroll after dinner

6. I don't smoke

7. I don't drink beer (well, not much)

8. I won't go out with the boys but would rather spend time at home with you

9. I have no desire buy large screen televisions or motorcycles

10. I have no aversion to kissing your feet

11. I have no emotional baggage

12. I'll eat anything you put in front of me, and enjoy it

13. I'm willing to defend you from the bad guys with my life
Image: Yukon Jack


DDMills said...

Ah yes, the fantasy man, can come kiss my feet post!

Zee said...

Recently my husband enthused about a human interest story on NPR (that's National Public Radio for you non-USA folks). Somebody extolled the virtues of treating your mate like your dog treats you. How exciting to be welcomed at the door like your dog welcomes you! How exciting to have a meal you prepared welcomed with jumping and happiness! How exciting to have any meal you prepare welcomed, no matter what it is! How exciting to have your partner eat the same thing every meal and delight in doing so!

Well, you get the picture. Funny thing.... my husband is still thinking about that little program snippet. Sooner or later, I'm gonna place a meal in front of him and he'll bark and lick my face, huh? Cool.

Ellie Heller said...

Absolutely ideal...except that they don't clean up after themselves and can be very demanding of attention at times you may not have it to give. (this from a person with a puppy :-) )

Gina Ardito said...

I'm willing to give it a try. Where do I turn in my old model for the new and improved one (which will not start "pawing" me when I'm not in the mood, either! LOL!)

Chumplet said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Chumplet said...

I was going to say, they can all be trained. The dogs, I mean.

Zara Penney said...

Chumplet you know what they say:

"He may have hair upon his...


But golly so have doggies..."


wordtryst said...

I have only fond memories of all of the dogs who shared my life. Not so of my ex-husband and ex-boyfriends. There's a moral in there somewhere.

Chumplet, I've tagged you for a meme. Before you strangle me, remember it's optional! You might like it, though, because it's a bookish meme.